Pressing Pause

Wouldn’t it be awesome if you could press pause in life like you can on your TV?

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Not like Zack Morris when he would break the fourth wall during Saved by the Bell although that would be cool too. I’m referring more to the ability to pause life and take a break.

Life moves quicker the older I get. I remember when I was in middle school the summers seemed to last forever. Each hot month was long and packed with so many memories. Things move quicker now. Six months flash by in the blink of an eye. Now years get muddled together like mint leaves in the bottom of a cocktail glass.

I ran away to the beach last week. I didn’t really run away but more so pressed pause. I wanted and needed a week off. Upon getting back I realized it will take me two weeks to catch up but it was well worth it.

I wanted to sleep in, read for hours on end, and stare out into the water. That is exactly what I did.

The books I read last week all had a similar theme. In one way or another they were all about sacrifice. In order to get something you want you have to make sacrifices. It might be as simple as sleep, television, hanging out with friends, or whatever else you might want to do with the little spare time you have. Sometimes it is bigger.

I thought a lot about this while staring into the ocean. My sacrifices seem small. There are others who seem to sacrifice so much and I feel miniature in comparison. I have been focused on my weaknesses a lot in the past few weeks. I want to be better at dealing with conflict but something doesn’t want to change deep within me. I have thought it is a sacrifice for me to change but I don’t feel that way now. I don’t think it is a sacrifice at all. It’s simply something I don’t want to do.

There are things I know I could do better if I just did them. I should workout more regularly. I should deal with conflict head on instead of cowering away from it like I so often do. Why don’t I do these things? Nobody is preventing me from doing them except for me. It’s easy to tell yourself you will never be perfect and there is no reason to attempt perfection.

But if you hit pause on life you can see things clearer.

You realize sometimes your detriments cause others pain. It’s not all about you. Being an introvert I tend to get caught up in everything going on with me and forget about others. Had I not paused last week I don’t think I would have realized this.

So I haven’t run away from anything but rather I have attempted to shy away from it. I longed for a week to press pause. Now it is time to press play. Time to stop making everything about me and time to start getting uncomfortable. Pressing pause helped me see clearer.

You don’t need a week away to do it. Take whatever time you can get and stop. Take a deep breath and think about your sacrifices. Think about what bothers you and remind yourself it’s not all about you.